Stanford Girl Problems

Ranked by CollegeProwler as the smartest girls in the Country.

The 10 weirdest moments in Mayor Bloomberg’s Commencement speech

1.The constant Stanford inside jokes…from fro-yo-pro-fro-co-ho to Full Moon on the Quad, they all felt misplaced. Also, Wizard of Odd?

2. The pitch to move to New York.

3. Talking about being an average student in college and getting fired from Salomon Brothers. He was an EE major and student body class president. And that firing came with a $10 million severance package.

4. The “inspirational” story about the guy doing a tech startup from his parent’s basement. He may have worn a suit every day… but yeah, still hung up on the parent’s basement thing.

5. “For your job now you’ll wear jeans, but in a few years…Hello Brooks Brothers!”

6. “Move to New York, where you can get a girlfriend whose name isn’t Siri.”

7. “Follow the same wind of freedom your ancestors followed when they came to America.” Unless, you know, your ancestors were slaves.

8. “I hope you will all call your Congressmen and make your voices heard.” Was this graduation, or a political speech? I mean, I get that immigration reform and lgbt rights are important, but I’d like more about advice and congratulations and less about the American Dream.

9. “STEM majors’ diplomas should come stapled to a green card.” Fuzzies can go back to France, or wherever they come from.

10. “One last beer at Illusions”….what?

Anonymous asked: what is match13?

Match13 was a thing for seniors where you submitted 10 crushes, and if they ranked you, you each got an email and then realized you were in love and got married and had perfect Stanford babies.

Or no one ranked you back. #foreveralone